{"id":20830,"date":"2014-11-20T12:06:45","date_gmt":"2014-11-20T10:06:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/?p=20830"},"modified":"2014-11-20T12:06:45","modified_gmt":"2014-11-20T10:06:45","slug":"rambling-thoughts","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/rambling-thoughts\/","title":{"rendered":"Rambling thoughts"},"content":{"rendered":"

If walking is good for your health,\u00a0the postman should be immortal.<\/span><\/p>\n

A whale swims all day, only eats\u00a0fish, and drinks water, but is still fat.<\/p>\n

A rabbit runs and hops and only\u00a0lives 15 years, while a tortoise doesn’t run and does\u00a0mostly nothing, yet it lives for 150 years. And they tell u> to exercise? I don’t think so.<\/p>\n

Now that I’m older, here’s\u00a0what I’ve discovered:<\/b><\/p>\n

1. I started out with nothing, and\u00a0I still have most of it.<\/span><\/p>\n

2. My wild oats are mostly enjoyed\u00a0with prunes and all-bran.<\/span><\/p>\n

4. Funny, I don’t remember\u00a0being absent-minded.<\/span><\/p>\n

5. Funny, I don’t remember\u00a0being absent-minded.<\/span><\/p>\n

6. If all is not lost, then where\u00a0the heck is it?<\/span><\/p>\n

7. It was a whole lot easier to get\u00a0older than it was to get wiser.<\/span><\/p>\n

8. Some days, you’re the top\u00a0dog, some days you’re the hydrant.<\/span><\/p>\n

9. I wish the buck really did stop\u00a0here, I sure could use a few of them.<\/span><\/p>\n

10. Kids in the back seat cause\u00a0accidents.<\/span><\/p>\n

11. Accidents in the back seat\u00a0cause kids.<\/span><\/p>\n

12. It’s hard to make a\u00a0comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.<\/span><\/p>\n

13. The world only beats a path to\u00a0your door when you’re in the\u00a0bathroom.<\/span><\/p>\n

14. If God wanted me to touch my\u00a0toes, he’d have put them on my knees.<\/span><\/p>\n

15. When I’m finally holding\u00a0all the right cards, everyone wants to play\u00a0chess .<\/span><\/p>\n

16. It’s not hard to meet\u00a0expenses . . . they’re everywhere.<\/span><\/p>\n

17. The only difference between a\u00a0rut and a grave is the depth.<\/span><\/p>\n

18. These days, I spend a lot of\u00a0time thinking about the hereafter\u2026I go somewhere to get\u00a0something, and then wonder what I’m ”here\u00a0after”.<\/span><\/p>\n

19. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.<\/span><\/p>\n

20. It is a lot better to be seen\u00a0than viewed.<\/span><\/p>\n

21. Have I sent this message to you\u00a0before…or did I get it from you?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u00a0 You’re\u00a0welcome.<\/span><\/p>\n

from my friend Carlton in Charlotte NC<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

If walking is good for your health,\u00a0the postman should be immortal. A whale swims all day, only eats\u00a0fish, and drinks water, but is still fat. A rabbit runs and hops and only\u00a0lives 15 years, while a tortoise doesn’t run and does\u00a0mostly nothing, yet it lives for 150 years. And they tell u> to exercise? I […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[4,7],"tags":[2675],"class_list":["post-20830","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-english-stuff","category-ett-gott-skratt","tag-thoughts"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1IAXy-5pY","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":9861,"url":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/some-senior-humours\/","url_meta":{"origin":20830,"position":0},"title":"Some senior humours \u00a4\u00a4\u00a4","author":"bengt39","date":"2011-02-08","format":false,"excerpt":"THREE OLD GUYS WALKING Three old guys are out walking. First one says, 'Windy, isn't it?' Second one says, 'No, it's Thursday!' Third one says, 'So am I. Let's go get a beer SENIOR CITIZEN A senior citizen said to his eighty-year old buddy: 'So I hear you're getting married?'\u2026","rel":"","context":"I \u201d1 English stuff\u201d","block_context":{"text":"1 English stuff","link":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/category\/english-stuff\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":18062,"url":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/what-is-time\/","url_meta":{"origin":20830,"position":1},"title":"WHAT IS TIME..","author":"admin","date":"2013-09-20","format":false,"excerpt":"Stay Young My Friend We all need to read this one over and over until it becomes part of who we are! HOW YO STAY YOUNG 1.. Try everything twice. On one woman's tombstone she said she wanted this epitaph:\"Tried everything twice. Loved it both times!\" 2. Keep only cheerful\u2026","rel":"","context":"I \u201d9 Underh\u00e5llning\u201d","block_context":{"text":"9 Underh\u00e5llning","link":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/category\/underhallning\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"image002","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/image002.gif?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":13437,"url":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/golfstory-2\/","url_meta":{"origin":20830,"position":2},"title":"Golfstory ll \u00a4\u00a4\u00a4","author":"bengt39","date":"2012-02-23","format":false,"excerpt":"This is\u00a0David Letterman's Top Ten Reasons Why Golf Is Better Than Sex...... 10...\u00a0A below par performance is considered damn good. 9..... You can stop in the middle and have a cheeseburger and a couple of beers. 8... It's much easier to find the sweet spot. 7.. Foursomes are encouraged. 6...\u2026","rel":"","context":"I \u201d1 English stuff\u201d","block_context":{"text":"1 English stuff","link":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/category\/english-stuff\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":21033,"url":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/potensen\/","url_meta":{"origin":20830,"position":3},"title":"Potensen","author":"admin","date":"2013-12-12","format":false,"excerpt":"You\u2019re in remarkable shape for a man your age,\u201d said the doctor to the 90-year-old man after the examination. \u201c1 know it,\u201d said the old gentleman. \u201cI\u2019ve really got only one complaint\u2014my sex drive is too high. Got anything you can do for that, Doc?\u201d The doctor\u2019s mouth dropped open.\u2026","rel":"","context":"I \u201d2 JOKES\u201d","block_context":{"text":"2 JOKES","link":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/category\/ett-gott-skratt\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":19600,"url":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/19600\/","url_meta":{"origin":20830,"position":4},"title":"A Blonde Joke","author":"admin","date":"2014-03-26","format":false,"excerpt":"An old, blind cowboy wandered into an all-girl biker bar by mistake. He found his way to a barstool and ordered a shot of Jack Daniels. After sitting there for a while, he yelled to the bartender, \"Hey, you wanna\u00a0hear a blonde joke?\" The bar immediately fell absolutely silent. 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One day they were playing cards when one looked at the other and\u2026","rel":"","context":"I \u201d1 English stuff\u201d","block_context":{"text":"1 English stuff","link":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/category\/english-stuff\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/10\/image002.gif?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20830","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20830"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20830\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20831,"href":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20830\/revisions\/20831"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20830"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20830"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fatherben.se\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20830"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}