1 English stuff

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Better than the latest flue shot ¤¤¤

   

Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties.  And had never been married.
She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all.
One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room.
She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea.
As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a cut glass bowl sitting on top of it.
The bowl was filled with water and in the water floated, of all things, a condom!.   When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat.
The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist.
’Miss Beatrice’, he said, ’I wonder if you would tell me about this?’, pointing to the bowl.
’Oh, yes,’ she replied, ’Isn’t it wonderful?
I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground.
The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven’t had the flu All winter.’ 

A Contribution from Anders in Viken and reminded of by Paul in Provence

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Better than the latest flue shot ¤¤¤

   

Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties.  And had never been married.
She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all.
One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room.
She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea.
As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a cut glass bowl sitting on top of it.
The bowl was filled with water and in the water floated, of all things, a condom!.   When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat.
The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist.
’Miss Beatrice’, he said, ’I wonder if you would tell me about this?’, pointing to the bowl.
’Oh, yes,’ she replied, ’Isn’t it wonderful?
I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground.
The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven’t had the flu All winter.’ 

A Contribution from Anders in Viken and reminded of by Paul in Provence

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Tough landing ¤¤¤

On one particular flight the pilot had hammered his plane into the runway really hard.

The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the passengers exited, give a smile, and a “Thanks for flying XYZ airline.”

In light of his bad landing, he had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment, but no one seemed annoyed.

Finally everyone had gotten off except for one little old lady walking with a cane. She approached and asked conspiratorially,

“Sonny, mind if I ask you a question?”

“Why no Ma’am, what is it?”

“Did we land or were we shot down?”

A contribution from Jörgen M61

More tough  landings