A senior citizen said to his eighty-year old buddy:
’So I hear you’re getting married?’
’Yep!’
’Do I know her?’
’Nope!’
’This woman, is she good looking?’
’Not really.’
’Is she a good cook?’
’Naw, she can’t cook too well.’
’Does she have lots of money?’
’Nope! Poor as a church mouse.’
’Well, then, is she good in bed?’
’I don’t know.’
’Why in the world do you want to marry her then?’
’Because she can still drive!’
2 JOKES
Morris 82
Morris an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical.
A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm.
A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, ’You’re really doing great, aren’t you?’
Morris replied, ’Just doing what you said, Doc: ’Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.”
The doctor said, ’I didn’t say that… I said, ’You’ve got a heart murmur; be careful.’
A contribution from Ole
LIFE WITH THE ROYALS: CAMILLA’S NEW SHOES ¤¤¤
Camilla bought a new pair of shoes for her wedding which got increasingly tight as the day went on. That night, after the festivities were finally over, she & Charles retired back to their room. Camilla flopped on the bed and said
’Please remove my shoes darling, one’s feet are killing one.’
Ever obedient, the Prince of Wales attacked her right shoe with vigour. But It wouldn’t budge ’Harder!’ yelled Camilla.
’Harder?’ Charles yelled back. ’I’m trying darling! But it’s just so bloody tight, ’Come on give it all you’ve got, ’ she cried.
Finally when it released, Charles let out a big groan, and Camilla exclaimed, ’Oh god, that feels so good !’
In their bedroom next door, the Queen turned to Prince Phillip and said,
’See, I told you she would still be a virgin with a face like that.’
Meanwhile back in the other bedroom, Charles was attempting to remove the other shoe when he cried out, ’Oh god, darling, this one’s even tighter.’
At which point Prince Phillip turned and said to the Queen: ’That’s my boy; once a navy man, always a navy man!’
A Contribution from Anders in Viken
LIFE WITH THE ROYALS: CAMILLA'S NEW SHOES ¤¤¤
Camilla bought a new pair of shoes for her wedding which got increasingly tight as the day went on. That night, after the festivities were finally over, she & Charles retired back to their room. Camilla flopped on the bed and said
’Please remove my shoes darling, one’s feet are killing one.’
Ever obedient, the Prince of Wales attacked her right shoe with vigour. But It wouldn’t budge ’Harder!’ yelled Camilla.
’Harder?’ Charles yelled back. ’I’m trying darling! But it’s just so bloody tight, ’Come on give it all you’ve got, ’ she cried.
Finally when it released, Charles let out a big groan, and Camilla exclaimed, ’Oh god, that feels so good !’
In their bedroom next door, the Queen turned to Prince Phillip and said,
’See, I told you she would still be a virgin with a face like that.’
Meanwhile back in the other bedroom, Charles was attempting to remove the other shoe when he cried out, ’Oh god, darling, this one’s even tighter.’
At which point Prince Phillip turned and said to the Queen: ’That’s my boy; once a navy man, always a navy man!’
A Contribution from Anders in Viken