A nice contribution from Paul in Provence

A contribution from grandchild Filip 13..

A clearly inebriated woman, stark naked, jumped into 
a taxi in New York City and laid down on the back seat.

The cab driver, an old Jewish gentleman, opened his 
eyes wide and stared at the woman. He made no attempt 
to start the cab. 
The woman glared back at him and said, ”What’s wrong 
with you, honey? – Haven’t you ever seen a naked 
woman before?”
The old Jewish driver answered, ”Let me tell you 
sumsing, lady I vasn’t staring at you like you 
tink; det vould not be proper vair I come from.”

The drunk woman giggled and responded, ”Well, if 
you’re not staring at my boobs or ass sweetie, what 
are you doing then?” 

He paused a moment, then told her…”Vell,M’am, 
I am looking and I am looking, and I am tinking 
to myself,’Vair in da hell is dis lady keeping 
de money to pay for dis ride?

A contribution from Jörgen M61

A wife, being romantic, sent her husband a text:

”If you are sleeping, send me your dreams.

If you are laughing, send me your smile.

If you are eating, send me a bite.

If you are drinking send me a sip.

If you are crying, send me your tears.  I love you!”

The husband replied,

              ”I am sitting on the toilet.    Please advise…”

A contribution from Paul in Provence