Författare: admin

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Golfing accident

Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony.

The woman rushed down to the man, and immediately began to apologize. ’Please allow me to help. I’m a Physical Therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you’d allow me, she told him.

’Oh, no, I’ll be all right. I’ll be fine in a few minutes,’ the man replied. He was in obvious agony, lying in the fetal position, still clasping his hands there at his groin. At her persistence, however, he finally allowed her to help.

She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, loosened his pants and put her hands inside She administered tender and artful massage for several long moments and asked, ’How does that feel’?

Feels great, he replied; but I still think my thumb’s broken!

A contribution from Hans the footdoc

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Pärleporten

Pärleporten

En busschaufför och en präst stod utanför pärleporten. Sankte Per släppte in chauffören men prästen nekades tillträde.-Det var det värsta, utbrast prästen. Skulle en gudsman nekas inträde till paradiset  medan en oborstad busschaufför få komma in.–

Det har sina orsaker, sa Per. Dina predikningar var oengagerade och tråkiga och församlingen halvsov hela tiden. Men när han körde sin buss bad alla till Gud.

En rolig en igen från  Olemand

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An Irish joke

 

Voted Best Joke in Ireland 2006

John O’Reilly hoisted his beer and said, ”Here’s to spendig the rest of me life, between the legs of me wife!”

That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night!

He went home and told his wife, Mary, ”I won the prize for the Best toast of the night”. She said, ”Aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?”

John said, ”Here’s to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside me wife.” – ”Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!” Mary said.

The next day, Mary ran into one of John’s drinking buddies on the street corner.

The man chuckled leeringly and said, ”John won the prize the other night at the pub with a toast about you, Mary.”

She said, ”Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he’s only been there twice in the last four years.

Once he fell asleep, and the other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come.

A contribution from Lawrence (not from Arabia)