A contribution from CGH Suomi
smart
Buffalo Theory ¤¤¤
One night at pub, Cliff explained the” Buffalo Theory”to
his buddy Norm when suggesting a new round…
”Well, ya see, Norm, it’s like this.
A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo.
And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first.
This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general
speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular
killing of the weakest members! .
In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells.
Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells.
But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first.
In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain
a faster and more efficient machine!
That’s why you always feel smarter after a few beers.
Another nice TordJöran contribution imported from over there
Smart old men ¤¤¤
An elderly man in Louisiana had owned a large farm for several years.
He had a large pond in the back.
It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees.
One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn’t been there for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit.
As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting And laughing with glee..
As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond.
He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.
One of the women shouted to him, ’We’re not coming out until you leave!
The old man frowned, ’I didn’t come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the pond naked.’
Holding the bucket up he said, ’I’m here to feed the alligator.’
Some old men can still think fast.!!
Origin from my friend Carlton in Charlotte NC reminded of by Paul in Provence
Good morning ¤¤¤
A man kills a deer and takes it home to cook for dinner.
Both he and his wife decide that they won’t tell the kids what kind of meat it is,
but will give them a clue and let them guess.
The kids were eager to know what the meat was on their plates, so they begged their dad for a clue.
The dad said,
’Well, it’s what mommy calls me sometimes.’
The little girl screams to her brother, ’Don’t eat it! It’s an asshole!’
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A herd of buffalo can move only as fast as the slowest buffalo,
and when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest
ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection
is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed
and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular
culling of the weakest members.
In much the same way the human brain can only operate
as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol,
we all know, kills brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest
and weakest brain cells first. In this way regular consumption
of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a
faster and more efficient machine.
So that’s why you always feel smarter after a few beers.