Jokes for golfers ¤¤¤

Two 90 year old men, Mike and Joe, have been friends all of their lives.
When it’s clear that Joe is dying, Mike visits him every day. One day Mike says,
”Joe, we both loved golf all our lives, and we played golf on Saturdays together
for so many years. Please do me one favor, when you get to Heaven, somehow
you must let me know if there’s golf there.”

Joe looks up at Mike from his death bed,” Mike, you’ve been my best friend for
many years. If it’s at all possible, I’ll do this favor for you.
Shortly after that, Joe passes on.

At midnight a couple of nights later, Mike is awakened from a sound sleep by a
blinding flash of white light and a voice calling out to him,
”Mike–Mike. ”
”Who is it? asks Mike sitting up suddenly. ”Who is it?”
”Mike–it’s me, Joe.”
”You’re not Joe. Joe just died.”
”I’m telling you, it’s me, Joe,” insists the voice.”
”Joe! Where are you?”

”In heaven”, replies Joe. ”I have some really good news and a little bad news.”
”Tell me the good news first,” says Mike.
”The good news,” Joe says,” is that there’s golf in heaven. Better yet, all of our
old friends who died before us are here, too. Better than that, we’re all young again.
Better still, it’s always spring time and it never rains or snows. And best of all,
we can play golf all we want, and we never get tired.”

That’s fantastic,” says Mike. ”It’s beyond my wildest dreams! So what’s the bad news?
”You’ve been booked to play this Saturday.”

A golfjoke

Ed and Harriet met while on a cruise, and Ed fell head over heels in love with her.

On the last night of his vacation, the two of them went to dinner and had a serious talk about how they would continue their relationship.

’It’s only fair to warn you, I’m a total golf nut,’ Ed said to his lady friend. ’I eat, sleep and breathe golf, so if that’s a problem, you’d better say so now.

’Harriet responded, ’If we’re being honest with each other, here it goes… I’m a hooker.’

’I see,’ Ed replied, and was quiet for a moment. Then he added, ’You know, it’s probably because you’re not keeping your wrists straight when you tee off.’

A nice contribution from Paul in Provence